So I had a pre-birthday party today. I was getting all excited all day. Long story made short: I ate pizza, drank vitamin water, shared some secrets, heard some secrets, got nervous, was asked about my life story, got nervous some more, took some breaths, went to the bathroom to calm myself, returned, got nervous about potential drama, got nervous about being nervous, ran to the bathroom threw up in my hand, threw up in the sink, clogged the sink and toliet, unclogged the sink and toliet, returned to the party, guests left, told my mom I had fun, mom told me to go to bed, I’m nervous about being in a room for 4hrs tomorrow morning with my brain and its anxiety, and I’m sleepy. I don’t have the energy for this. I’m so tired, and my throat hurts. This is like the 2nd week in a row that I’ve thrown up. I’m scheduling a thereapist appointment next week. I’m going to bed now. I need help, this is insanity. I need to go to college. I need to grow up.

The worst part is: there is another box of pizza left.

Goodnight.